where were you?

We often hear praise for people who overcome difficult circumstances such as losing a spouse or child, fighting disease or surviving warfare and giving their life a positive turn.

An example of this is Mr. Frank O'Dea, a Canadian businessman who was homeless until 1975, when he managed to slowly get his life back in order and he evntually co-founder the Second Cup chain of coffee shops, and is President and Co-Founder of charitable organizations.

What Mr. O'Dea did is absolutely incredible and fascinating, he deserves every single ounce of praise he receives, we can all learn from him.

My point though is not about Mr. O'Dea directly, it's about people CURRENTLY in the situation he found himself in in the early 1970's.

There are more homeless than ever before (in Canada) despite the fact there are more resources than ever before.

We, as a society like using people like Mr. O'Dea as examples when it's convenient to us. (IE. "Look at him, he did, why can't you?")

The excuse that people need to "help themselves" is crass at best.

Next time you see a homeless person, and you think of Frank O'Dea, ask your this. If this person becomes another Frank O'Dea, do I want to have simply walked buy, or do I want to be part of the beginning of something big?

Ask the right question

I've often been amused by the statement (often used by "Positive Psychologists") "You're just not asking the right questions".

what I find amusing is not the idea of searching for the source of a problem, but rather that there's discrimination in how a person goes about it.

A prime example is a depressed person; in positive psych, the question they would see fit is "what can I (depressed person) do about it?". As well intentioned as that is, it omits to ask "Am I depressed (or is it something else)?", "Why am I depressed?", "Have I felt this way before?"...

To the "positive" crowd, these questions may seem irrelevant, redundant, and a waste of time, but how can one truly access the root of the problem without asking those questions?

Simply asking "What can I do about it?" doesn't get to the root of the problem, it actually promotes avoidance (IE. I'll occupy myself and pretend "it" isn't there).

Asking the tougher questions such as "am I depressed?", or "Why am I depressed?" are precisely that, tougher, but also truer.

I thought of this topic not specifically in regards to depression, but more social issues. One issue which is close to me is homelessness since it is often related with mental illness.

When you see a homeless person what question do you ask yourself? Do you ask "How can a person bring themselves to that?" or the tougher "How does the society that I belong to accept this for it's own citizens?"

I'm sure there's tons of other questions, some tougher than others, but next time you start asking questions, maybe the first one should be "Is this the TOUGH question?"