Difficulty posting

I have not posted in too long (to me). It's not due to a lack of things to write about going on in my life (work, relationships, finances, goals...) and how these impact my mood.

I often even write down blogging ideas, yet when the time comes to put it on here, I just don't.

Several factors account for this, lower energy level, bad time management, simple laziness.

I recognize a bit of a more insidious reason; I have expectations for this blog.

I say insidious because un-realized expectations have often been a trigger for depressive episodes. I have began jobs why expectations of this one being "The One", gotten new apartments with lofty goals of "this is where I'll establish myself once for good". There's nothing wrong with appropriate goal setting, and having ambition, but all in appropriate terms.

This remains "only" a blog, one among millions out there. A good one (I like to think), but one of many regardless of it's quality.

I also have bigger goals such as emigrating to Australia (which everything that will encompass), and getting settled down with my fiancee. Now I recognize how those are much loftier, yet more important, and definitely achievable.

This blog is just one of those many (seemingly) "less important" goals. The whole "Nothing dramatic will happen if I don't blog today" creeps in. As true as that is, if I choose not to blog based on that reasoning, I'm validating the excuse, and before you know it I won't be blogging at all.

Some things are more important than others, but just because something is less important is no reason to stop entirely.